i ripped my headphones out of my ears and asked the girl next to me: 'did you hear that? are we seriously almost finished?!' and she smiled back at me: 'i know. crazy right?'
i had run nine.teen. kilometres. i had ran into quebec. and back to ontario. around the rideau canal. and up a winding hill [seriously. who's idea was that?] and past seven drumming bands and a few live music acts and thousands of spectators cheering us [me.] on as i ran past. i had accidentally showered a baby in a stroller in red gatorade as i ran past one of those cooling stations on the road and threw a half cup onto the sidelines where the stroller was unfortunately parked. i had been up sick with nerves since 4.30 in the morning. i had stopped sweating and was only salting thanks to the gatorade and hammer vanilla endurance gels. which i took straight. which is quite disgusting but also made me feel super cool as i tossed the wrappers on the road and kept running.
and in 2 kilometres it would be over?
at 8:59 that morning, i was literally shaking at the starting line with the rest of the green corral waiting for the gun to go off. i begged my stepmom who had somehow talked me into setting this goal the same week my ex husband moved out not to leave me in her half marathon dust when the air horn went off. there were thousands of us like cattle at the start line. eleven thousand and fifty four. i told her i wanted to run with the 2:15 pace bunny despite an umbilical hernia slowing my training down over the past 6-8 weeks. at 9:03 i timidly looked behind me at her and mouthed: 'is it okay if i go?' and she smiled and waved for me to go. and i took off ahead of her and her mom [who. for the record. finished first in the 70+ age group.ah.mazing.] to catch that 2:15 pace bunny.
i didn't set the pedometer. i didn't check the time. i pressed shuffle. and i ran.
and i ran.
and i ran.
i ran 13.1 miles. 21.something kilometres.
i am not a runner.
in fact, at 8:20 when we were lined up at the lord elgin to pee pre-race, i looked around at all the runners and panicked: 'what am i doing with this official number on?'. seriously. i just stretched and kept telling myself i would finish just fine. i prayed but already had entire trust that i would finish free of injury etc. because i had set this goal months ago + trained for it + developed a love/hate-on for it + had bought a runner's fanny pack for goodness sakes so i was finishing this race. yes. a runners fanny pack. where you put your ipod and your hammer endurance gels. it had neon pink trim. just saying.
so 2 km left. it was so hot. like sunny and 29 degrees and about 5 km in i realized that in the midst of all the nerves i had forgotten sunscreen [so today i am rudolph]. my body was exhausted. this was officially the longest run of my life to date. as i approached the '1km to go' mark, the street was literally lined with hundreds of people and the announcer cheering us on. unreal. i ripped out my headphones for the last time to really just take in all of this. my first real.live.actual.happening. race. my first finish line. my first starting line.
sign: 1000km until finish.
sign: 750km until finish.
i slowed down to a fast walk. i wanted to finish strong and give myself a really short break. so did the guy next to me. so we shared a quick chat and shared an endurance gel and then said 'okay see you at the finish!' and we both took off.
sign: 400km until finish.
sign: 200km until finish.
this is when i started to cry.
behind my neon framed aviators, i started to cry. i couldn't believe i was about to cross that finish line. and i finished crying. and i finished strong. well. strong for having just ran over 21 km.
i finished the race and just cried. what a girl i am. but it was a pretty amazing feeling to cross that finish line after setting such a CRAZY goal only a few months ago after almost never having gone for a run in my whole twenty seven but who is counting years. i sat in the shade under a tree and tasted the salt that was sweating out of my arm and gave myself a few minutes to take it all in.
i am so thankful that di had this crazy idea for me to register for a half marathon months ago.
i am so thankful for every.single.ounce of support that came out of the people closest to me + my old + new friends + facebook 'likes'+ comments and the whole nine. for the email i received two nights before the race + the phone call from my big sister somewhere around the 18th km to wish me luck + the texts + the love + the tweets + all of it. so thankful.
i am an actual real.live. [half] marathon competitor. obv still on the post-run high. and totally looking forward to finding and setting my next physical goal and conquering it too ;)
i'm thinking maybe kick boxing. those shorts come in neon right?
-kare
xo
No comments:
Post a Comment